What a Day!

Ok to start out with my day I wake up every morning Monday Through Friday at 5:30Am and get all 3 boys ready for school. Sami gets on his bus at about 6:40 and Elijah at 7am so then me and Christopher go home and eat breakfast and watch cartoons. My boyfriend found out he is sick on Wednesday and has yet to go to the hospital and I am hoping he does that today. I have felt Helpless this whole time but he tells me that I have helped him more than I think. I know I sent him some Tea last night to help him sleep but his fever was bad from what I am told. I could barely sleep knowing he is so sick and me not being able to take care of him. I love him so much and all I want to do right now is be there for him. Also I have not been able to talk to my cousin Cory in a week or two and I miss him terribly. I have my Bestie Angie who I talk to and tell everything to and other than her I talk to my cousin and tell him everything. I only found out about him last year and I have felt so close to him in this past year. I really need my cousin right now as well as my bestie to lean on while my boyfriend is sick because I need someone to talk to while he is resting so I don't drive myself crazy with all of this.

The boys had a Great first week of school and I am so very proud of my boys. They have been amazing all week except the fact that Elijah came home with a note in his folder saying he has not been listening at all. Which don't surprise me at all, I wish one of my kids would be great in school and I figured Elijah would have been the one to do that.

I need you Angie and Cory.. I wish Cory would finally come visit me so I can meet him and finally have cousin time with him!

Good Evening

Well I know I missed a few days of Writing in my blog.. Sorry its been really busy over here lately. Yesterday we had 2 surprise visitors one of which works with my sorry ex and these guys had no clue where I lived and now all of a sudden they know exactly what trailer I live in and where. It was kinda strange if you ask me. But my son Elijah's dad showed up and that was a very pleasant visit with him. He really is a great dad but even more he is a good friend of mine. Christopher is doing well with his Therapy thankfully and he is getting a little bit of somewhere in that.

Anyways, Things have just been Hectic here and I have been extremely tired seeing as its the first week of school and I am also testing a schedule for myself as well. All the boys like their reward system and have been trying hard to use it better. As for me well I'm tired more than usual trying to get everything on a schedule for all of us but its all trial and error. My boyfriend messaged me last night to tell me that he is sick which he has Strep Throat and our first reaction is oh no we hope I don't get sick or Christopher don't get sick.. I haven't been feeling very well all day so I am keeping my fingers crossed in hopes that I will not get anything from it.

Have you ever felt helpless knowing someone is sick and you really cannot do anything for them? Thats how I feel right now with my boyfriend. I know I can't do anything for him and I feel so lost without him.. I miss him a lot being able to hold him wise. I really do love him for who he is and for the way he looks at me and my boys. So you can see how I miss him a lot when we are apart, He walks up behind me and wraps his arms around me and kisses my neck which is heaven to me. He also does sweet things for me even if he doesn't realize he is doing them. He really is my soul mate for me and I'm glad he came to my doorstep to fix my toilet lol. Yes that is how we met he is one of the maintenance guys where I live and he is amazing.

First Day Of School

Welcome, Today was the First Day of School for both my 7 year old and my 5 year old. They were both Very excited this morning to go see/meet their friends and teachers. Sami Is in the local Alternative school and he was excited to see his friends and teachers again. Elijah went to meet new friends and meet his new teacher today. We all got up at 5:30 this morning and all 3 kids got ready (perfect training for Christopher) We first walked Sami to the bus stop at 6:30 this morning and both boys cried that their brother was getting on the bus. First Chris Cried because he didn't want his brother to go to school and Elijah cried because it was not his bus lol. Then at 7am we walked Elijah to the bus stop and he got on the bus like a champ and this time it was Mommy who cried. I was but wasn't ready for Elijah to leave today.

Both boys came home with Smiles on their faces and excited that they had a great first day of school. I'm so proud of my sons and they are all growing up so fast. Another two years and Christopher will be off on the school bus to school then Mommy will be lost without her babies. If I had a car Christopher would already be in daycare and going to head start to help him prepare for Kindergarten. I missed my boys today but Christopher was pretty much an Angel for me all day today.

We started a new reward system as well today thanks to Christophers Therapist. She made a list called WAY TO GO which includes the following for their rewards...

Listen the First time
Nice Touches (No Hitting)
Be Loving
Follow Home rules/ Do your Chores
Kind words/Actions

Each time they do exactly that they get  a couple little puff color balls that they get to put in a very large jar. When the jar fills up they have the following rewards to work with:

Special Snack
Special Movie
Outside time
Art time

We are going to impliment an art box for the boys that will have different things in it pertaining to art projects. I have even thought about making a quilt for each of them and each time they are good and they fill the jar they get to pick a new quilt square along with their reward for that day/week. I'm so excited to be doing this with my boys and Now Christopher and Elijah are walking around with their backpacks on acting like they are going to school..

Such a Proud Mommy here!

Today is a day of Testing

Hello everyone and Welcome again to my blog. Today is a day of testing with Christopher (My 3 1/2 year old) He refuses to listen to anything I say to him constantly. My sons refuse to listen to me period so we have an Intensive in home team that we are working with. Today is just a stressful day for me and I wish my family had a vehicle cause if we did I would be able to get the kids out of the house and going to the park. I am just stressed to the max today and not sure how much more I can handle.

Now before you Judge me remember I am a mom of a 7 year old, 5 year old and 3 1/2 year old all boys mind you. Sami Missed the bus this morning so his first day of school starts tomorrow instead of today. Tomorrow both Sami and Elijah will be at school for their first day.. I can't believe that my baby is starting school for the first time. I'm so proud of my sons and how far we have come but I know things are going to be coming in trials and tribulations. God gave me these boys for a reason and I aim to teach them to be better kids and to be amazing when they are adults. I also aim to teach them to treat a woman with respect and love them for who they are. They have seen abuse thanks to one of my ex's and they have seen what it does to women. Yes I am scarred from all the abuse I have had in the past years. But I am moving past all of that and getting on my feet..

Yes our family does not have money, or a vehicle to get around in. We are one of the poorest people we know. Poverty is real and it hits people like us, even the best people get hit with poverty.. We pay our bills every month on time and that is all we do anymore. We don't have extra money to do anything with its crazy and its unbalanced.. Every morning I have to be up at 5:30 and have sami Up and ready by 6:30 to get out the door and on the school bus. Then as soon as I get back I have to get Elijah up and ready by 7am and him out the door to meet the school bus. everything right now is crazy hectic and I am trying my best to handle it all. Can't wait for my escape tonight into a game of some sort to clear my mind. I wish I could just go for a nice long walk but I have to be in bed by 10pm so that I am up in the morning with the kids. If you don't mind please follow my blog so I know who is reading!

Got Ideas for a post? Let me know and I will write it.

Kerbal Space Program

Welcome for all my new readers. I wanted to start my blog this evening with instead of my normal day or how things went with a Video game that I play.

Kerbal Space Program is a great game that has NASA's approval on it. I have not been playing that long but it is a game that has definitely caught my interest. My boyfriend Jarod was the one that showed it to me since I do have an interest in Space and Astrology. I have found the game to be Difficult if you are not used to playing it at all but also I have found it very fun as well as challenging. I enjoy games that challenge the mind and this one definitely is at the top of my list.

Have you ever wanted to play a game that is so amazing and cool that you always want to play it but you don't know how? Well For the next few weeks I am going to dedicate a few hours during the day to play this amazing most Awesome game. I enjoy doing things like that because it is very fun and it helps teach you how things are in space. I am extremely fond of learning how to play this game because not only is it my boyfriends favorite but it is also about space and launching ships. You get to build these ships and then hope they launch into space. You wouldn't believe the views you would get up there its really beautiful. Plus the Kerbal's make it absolutely hilarious especially the first one you fly with Jebidiah.. A really weird name right but you should see the faces this kerbal gives to you when he is flying. He is such a Happy Kerbal all the time.

Last night before we went to bed, My boyfriend and I played a little of the game and he showed me more of what he has built in 2 years of playing. I can't wait to dive back into the game at some point tomorrow and see what all I can figure out about it. Always willing to keep my mind open and learn new things on a daily basis. I hope you all have a great night and I will see you all in the morning!

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A vote on our Christmas Good deed

Ok to explain every Christmas we do one good thing to help families that cannot afford things for Christmas even if we are in need we always find a way to donate to other families. Last year we collected donations of gently used toys and clothing for children and their families for presents. We helped 30 families last year and this year we are looking to do something similar to help families for Christmas. so We need Your help to figure out what we are going to do this year. Here are our Ideas..

1. Opening up a Go Fund me page and collecting Donations for getting presents and taking them up to our Local big hospital and giving presents to the Terminally ill children as well as handing some money to the parents of these amazing brave children for their medical bills.

2. Collecting donations to send boxes to our troops over seas so that they recieve some kind of support and love during that hard time when they cannot be with their families.

That is all we have come up with so far. If you have any Ideas Please comment and share them with me. I am trying to teach my sons that there is good people out there and that they can be one of those good people and help others out.

Good Morning

Good Morning everyone. I normally get asked what the definition of a Single mom is, Or you get someone saying your in a relationship so technically your are not a single mom. To Answer all of that Yes I am a Single Mom because I am not with my sons dads. It is not a Relationship status at all if you sit and really think about it. Its a Parental Status, Think about it you see lots of moms or dads in a relationship with someone that is not their child's mother/father biologically. Then you have to look closely at that relationship and see that maybe that other person is not helping take care of that child/children. A single parent is defined as the parent that takes care of the children more than 50% of the time. For me I take care of my 3 sons Full time and I have my bestie Angie who takes care  of her son and daughter Full time. Plus the parents that are barely in their children's life think Hey I'm a single parent and I want my child/children to show them off and make everyone think I'm this great role model for my child when in reality they are barely there and they don't understand what it takes to be that great parent for your child.

Yes all my sons have different dads so go ahead and Judge me and think what you want to think but I know that I have been in bad relationships that did not work out and no birth control don't always work and Condoms do not always work those things can fail at the wrong times. That does not change at all how I feel about my boys just because they have different dads don't mean I love them any less. I love my boys equally and with everything I am and I am willing to take care of them Day in and day out just because they are my world. I do everything for my boys and I love every minute of it because the payback for doing everything I do for them is hugs and kisses and those little I love yous all day long. Take a few minutes and think of why you would degrade a single parent for having different kids with different moms/dads? There are some of us who have had bad relationships and that did not want to get pregnant but it happened so they feel that they are responsible or maybe they are like me.. I do not believe in Abortion or adopting my child out. I helped make that child so they are my responsibility not anyone Else's. If the dad decides he wants nothing to do with said child then that is on them but I will not shun my child because he has a different father from the other child. Samuel's dad has nothing to do with him at all while I was pregnant he told me to get an abortion and I refused. I told him even though he wanted nothing to do with our child I wanted that baby. Samuel saved me from suicide because Kaiden was taken from me. And Here is where I tell you what nicknames all of my children have.

Kaiden is my little angel because he was my first born and I fell in love Instantly and knew that my prayers of wanting to be a parent were heard. Samuel is my Savior, Saving me from Suicide when Kaiden's dad took him from me and I was severely depressed. Elijah is my Miracle child because he has had the most health issues and we have been in and out of the hospital with him since he was born. At 3 weeks he went in the hospital and they thought he had Spinal meningitis, when he was 11 months old we found out he is allergic to Penicillin and he had Colitis and he was in the hospital for 4-5 days. Then at 4 1/2 he had to have his first surgery for an Inaugural hernia and circumcision and we wound up spending the night in the hospital because he was bleeding out of his little private area and that was scary. Then there is Christopher who is my little demon lol. He is meaner than hell but he can be a little angel when he wants to be. You see I do not love my sons any different from the other they are all my boys and I will always love them no matter what.

I hope everyone has a wonderful day today and I hope this opens your eyes to a few things about a Single parent. Please do not judge us because of our relationship status.. Its not a relationship status at all its a Parental status.

Interesting Day so far...

Welcome to those who are new to reading this blog. Today has been an Interesting day so far... Right now all 3 boys are laying down for their quiet time which is a normal routine in our house from 10-12 normally. Earlier this morning it was either Christopher or Elijah who hit me head on in the nose with their head which has resulted in a swollen nose and it hurts like no other lol. Last night I completed 4 loaves of Zucchini Bread which is absolutely amazing. And today I want to accomplish making 2-8 more loaves. Cooking and Baking is a passion for me and I absolutely love doing it.

All the household chores are shared by all 3 of the adults here which is Me, My mom and her girlfriend Breanna. The boys have their own chores as well to teach them responsibility. I did not get around to playing my game last night lol wound up getting busy because we had our new neighbors drop by and we were talking with them and having a few laughs. The boys were in bed at 7pm and asleep by 7:15pm but as usual on a normal night Elijah woke up and wound up waking Christopher back up so it was a little bit of a fight last night to get them to go back to bed. Elijah wound up getting up and he was crying because his knee hurt which hasn't happened in a while. He used to complain a lot that his legs hurt at night and I have taken him to the doctor to see what is going on with him but they said its just growing pains.

I am still in shock that next week Elijah starts school for the first time and I am not sure what to say or do about it. My baby is growing up so quickly and I am so proud of him because he has come so far. Samuel starts back on Monday and he is very excited to be going back because he loves his school. Sami goes to the local Alternative school here and they are more hands on then the regular schools. Its hard watching your babies grow up in front of your eyes and watch them go off to school every year. Sami will be in Second Grade this year and I am so proud of him. He reads at a Third grade level and also does math at the same level and he is so smart that I know he might wind up skipping a grade eventually because he is so smart.

When it comes time to start sending my boys to school I plan on teaching Christopher what I can here at home. All the basics and then some because he is one of the smartest 3 year olds I know. This weekend is another weekend that the bestie will be here spending time with us even if it is just 1 night. We normally send the kids off to church on Sunday mornings which is fun and nice because it gets them out of the house and playing with other kids their ages. Remember we are a family with no vehicle at all so we have no other way of getting out of the house unless we are just walking around or taking a trail to just get out of the house. So on a normal day we are stuck inside the house with nothing else to do so I like to try and play with the boys in the floor or watch cartoons with them.

Well this is coming to an end  So I bid you all Farewell and I hope that each and every one of you have a wonderful day today!

I'm Back hehe

Well Readers I told you I would be back and here I am. Currently Its bedtime for 3 little boys so we are working on getting them to go to sleep while I play Catch up on Laundry as well as baking 2 loaves of Zucchini bread. Today hasn't been one of the best days but I can't really complain much about it at all. Our stove went out this morning it was starting to spark and smoke from the indicator light. So we had to call Maintenance to have it fixed and instead they brought us a whole new stove well new to us that is hehe.

Anyways, Christopher's meeting with his new therapy team went very well we have one of them coming back tomorrow and on Friday. Things seem to really start looking up for us now and I'm getting really excited at where our lives are going. Got a lot going for us and sometimes we don't even realize what all is actually happening around us. For one I found someone so special that I can't see my life without that person. As well as The boys start back school on the 25th and the 26th and its just getting better from there. Christopher with his Therapy is going to help me out a lot they can teach me more ways to deal with him and his anger issues. Ever get one of those Mom or Dad moments where your still watching cartoons after your kids go to bed lol I am doing that right now.. I have yet to change the channel off of Disney Junior lol.

My goal over the next few days is to bake at least 12-14 loaves of Zucchini bread to get all this Zucchini used up. We are going to be giving the loaves to friends of ours who really like it or who haven't tried it yet. As for Tonight, Well after the 4 loaves are done plus all the laundry washed and dried then I plan on settling down on the couch and playing a video game with my special guy. We have been playing Unturned on Steam. Its a Zombie game but you can also challenge people as well. We are getting ready to start challenging other people on the game that way we can see where we need more practice at. Yes I am a mom and a Gamer but I know where gaming and my kids stand. My boys will always come before a video game any day of the week. Usually I don't play until they are in bed or if they are playing with their toys and not getting into anything. If you would like the recipe to the Zucchini bread please let me know..

Well Its time for me to go and check on my bread.. Hope you all have a wonderful night.

Taking things A little at a time

Things are always hectic here in our household. I am currently in the process of writing a Paper just because I want to and I do things like that when it just comes to me. I used to have a notebook with tons of my writings in it but when I left my ex over a year ago he took everything from me and it was one of the things I could not grab. Here lately a Lot has changed for my little family that involves just a lot of stuff. I personally have recently found what I believe to be the one thing I have searched for my entire life and thats True Love.. My boys may be very Hectic but I stick with them on a day to day basis to keep myself going.. For the past month My best friend has been coming on the weekends to stay with me and my family with her two amazing kids so its been 5 kids on the weekends and very fun. I am hoping to finish my paper very soon and to be able to post it on my blog.

Experience has everything to do with  my paper and I am very proud of what I have written. My writing is all thanks to my recent find in my inspiration and he has made it very easy for me to write. He has become my muse to all I do and all I write. Its nice to know that you have found someone that inspires you so much to be a better person and to write what is in your heart and what you are thinking about. Thank you and you know who you are for giving me so much inspiration to write again. I am amazed at what flows through my heart and my fingers these days. Writing has always been a passion of mine and I can only hope to get better with time and to write everything that I feel or that I want.

Well Time to get ready for my sons appointment. Christopher is meeting his new therapists today to see if we can get his anger under control. For a 3 year old he is extremely mean and hateful so we are hoping to fix all of this by getting him into therapy early. I will be back later to give you a look at how my daily life adds up to so much and my feelings on my son Elijah starting school next week for the very first time.